Thoughts

[valarltd]

I think I have gafiated.

I don't read any of the fannish mailing lists. I need to resign as listmom.
I don't read fannish squee in anyone's LJ.
I don't watch source.
I don't vid.
I don't read or write much fic.
I don't want to go to cons anymore, except as a guest.
I don't contribute meta.

And this year, the thought of signing up for yuletide fills me with weariness and dread instead of excitement.

My first thought was "I need November to write Alive on the Inside. I can't sacrifice three pages to yuletide." And I thought of the usual headdesk. And the hassle of writing to spec.


The Den of Debauchery will remain open.
The LJ will stay in place.

and if the fannish squee returns, it will be spread. If it doesn't, ah well.

The really awful part is that I'm not even sad to be leaving fandom. Just kind of...pensive.

Comments

[morgan-lowri.livejournal.com]

Yeah, realizing that part of your life is done with is always sort of an 'oh' moment.

It happened for me earlier this year when writing other people's characters just wasn't satisfying anymore, and even before that I was veering them off into AU Land and making them my own anyway.

So. Yeah.

*hugs*