A silly story
Aug. 21st, 2005 03:45 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
valarltdThe phone rang. I put down my sandwich, and answered it.
"Yes?"
"This is Mr. Soandso, the junior high principal. I need to see you in my office as soon as possible. It's about Chris."
"I'll be there in five minutes." Sandwich forgotten, I stepped back into my shoes and headed out.
Chris was sitting in the principal's office, his feet not quite reaching the ground. His growth spurt was due any day now. An ugly bruise was starting on his face.
"Hey, tiger."
"Hi, mom."
The secretary motioned us in. She looked awfully pale.
The principal sat behind his desk, two large frogs struggling to escape an empty aquarium before him.
"We have a very serious problem, ma'am."
"Yes?"
"Christopher has resorted to terroristic threatening." He indicated the amphibians on his desk.
I glared at my son. "Why did you put frogs in the principal's office?"
"I didn't, Mom."
"Sir, I'm not sure how frogs would be a threat."
He looked embarrassed. "Twenty minutes ago, they were boys."
"Christopher ALLAN!"
"Mom! It wasn't my fault."
I turned back to the principal. "Sir, are you saying my son turned two boys into frogs? Pardon me for saying it, but I think the stress has gotten to you."
"I have witnesses."
"All right. Explain yourself, young man. Most especially explain why you chose to hex someone on school property when you have been told and told that aggression of any sort is OUT of bounds at school."
"It's DeShawn and Mike. They caught me after PE and announced they were going to get in some fag-bashing. I did what you always told me to do, Mom. The second Mike hit me, I screamed, dropped to the floor and protected myself."
"Yes, good job. Go on."
"They kicked me a little, called me a few names. When DeShawn called me 'faggot' I told him 'that's not what your girlfriend says.' I'm Ok, mom. It just hurts to breathe."
"Excellent work."
"That's when they picked me up and stuffed me in the trash can. I was so mad, Mom, I just yelled at them. And they turned into frogs. Coach Peters saw it all."
"And why didn't Coach Peters stop them the second they hit you."
He mumbled something at the floor.
"I can't hear you, son."
"He thinks I'm gay too and it will toughen me up."
I glared at him. Then I turned the glare on the principal who now looked distinctly uncomfortable.
"My son," I caught Chris's face in my hand and pointed to the bruise, "was physically assaulted. He did not provoke the fight. He did not fight back. I suspect he has a couple of sprung ribs. He was stuffed in a trash can. He was abused in front of a teacher who did nothing."
"Ma'am, you know the law states that sexual orientation is NOT a protected status. If they'd bullied him for being a witch or for being white, that would be actionable."
"MY SON IS NOT GAY!" I was in his face now and he flinched. "Believe me. I have a gay child already, and this is NOT the one. Besides, he has a girlfriend. He is not a witch either. We're Methodist!"
The principal was upset enough that he was twitching. "But what will I do with these? Their mothers will be here soon to pick them up to serve their suspension for starting a fight. I can't hand them frogs."
I picked up the frogs and set them on the floor. A quick pass and a couple of words and Mike and DeShawn stood there, shaken and still in their gym clothes.
I took them each by a shoulder and met their eyes. "Let it be a lesson to you, boys. Next time, he won't do it in front of a coach. And he'll just drop you off in the biology lab."
I turned to the principal. "I apologize for Chris hexing them on school time. It was pure self-defense. However, as you cannot keep him safe, I will withdraw him. This won't happen again."
As we left, I could not resist leaning over and whispering "Dissection day," at the two bullies.
"Yes?"
"This is Mr. Soandso, the junior high principal. I need to see you in my office as soon as possible. It's about Chris."
"I'll be there in five minutes." Sandwich forgotten, I stepped back into my shoes and headed out.
Chris was sitting in the principal's office, his feet not quite reaching the ground. His growth spurt was due any day now. An ugly bruise was starting on his face.
"Hey, tiger."
"Hi, mom."
The secretary motioned us in. She looked awfully pale.
The principal sat behind his desk, two large frogs struggling to escape an empty aquarium before him.
"We have a very serious problem, ma'am."
"Yes?"
"Christopher has resorted to terroristic threatening." He indicated the amphibians on his desk.
I glared at my son. "Why did you put frogs in the principal's office?"
"I didn't, Mom."
"Sir, I'm not sure how frogs would be a threat."
He looked embarrassed. "Twenty minutes ago, they were boys."
"Christopher ALLAN!"
"Mom! It wasn't my fault."
I turned back to the principal. "Sir, are you saying my son turned two boys into frogs? Pardon me for saying it, but I think the stress has gotten to you."
"I have witnesses."
"All right. Explain yourself, young man. Most especially explain why you chose to hex someone on school property when you have been told and told that aggression of any sort is OUT of bounds at school."
"It's DeShawn and Mike. They caught me after PE and announced they were going to get in some fag-bashing. I did what you always told me to do, Mom. The second Mike hit me, I screamed, dropped to the floor and protected myself."
"Yes, good job. Go on."
"They kicked me a little, called me a few names. When DeShawn called me 'faggot' I told him 'that's not what your girlfriend says.' I'm Ok, mom. It just hurts to breathe."
"Excellent work."
"That's when they picked me up and stuffed me in the trash can. I was so mad, Mom, I just yelled at them. And they turned into frogs. Coach Peters saw it all."
"And why didn't Coach Peters stop them the second they hit you."
He mumbled something at the floor.
"I can't hear you, son."
"He thinks I'm gay too and it will toughen me up."
I glared at him. Then I turned the glare on the principal who now looked distinctly uncomfortable.
"My son," I caught Chris's face in my hand and pointed to the bruise, "was physically assaulted. He did not provoke the fight. He did not fight back. I suspect he has a couple of sprung ribs. He was stuffed in a trash can. He was abused in front of a teacher who did nothing."
"Ma'am, you know the law states that sexual orientation is NOT a protected status. If they'd bullied him for being a witch or for being white, that would be actionable."
"MY SON IS NOT GAY!" I was in his face now and he flinched. "Believe me. I have a gay child already, and this is NOT the one. Besides, he has a girlfriend. He is not a witch either. We're Methodist!"
The principal was upset enough that he was twitching. "But what will I do with these? Their mothers will be here soon to pick them up to serve their suspension for starting a fight. I can't hand them frogs."
I picked up the frogs and set them on the floor. A quick pass and a couple of words and Mike and DeShawn stood there, shaken and still in their gym clothes.
I took them each by a shoulder and met their eyes. "Let it be a lesson to you, boys. Next time, he won't do it in front of a coach. And he'll just drop you off in the biology lab."
I turned to the principal. "I apologize for Chris hexing them on school time. It was pure self-defense. However, as you cannot keep him safe, I will withdraw him. This won't happen again."
As we left, I could not resist leaning over and whispering "Dissection day," at the two bullies.
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no subject
Date: 2005-08-21 09:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-21 11:33 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-22 02:00 am (UTC)Or at least in my curse-breaking.
no subject
Date: 2005-08-22 02:12 am (UTC)Though I suspect there would be an army of skelton warriors raised rather than boys changed into frogs, but I could be wrong
no subject
Date: 2005-09-06 01:57 am (UTC)