Thoughts on Bullies

[valarltd]

Someone posted on a group that one should ignore bullies until they leave you alone. This, to my mind, is a fundamental misunderstanding of bullies. They do not bully to get a reaction out of you. You are a target, nothing more. If you cry, it makes it better, but if you ignore it, that is permission to bring out heavier artillery.

Bullies don't stop bothering you. They keep it up, until an outside agency steps in, or you are so badly hurt someone MUST step in. Or you die.

Words turn to blows.
But ignore them.

Blows turn to kicks.
It just means he likes you.

Blows become harder and harder until you are being tripped down the steps on a daily basis.
Ignore them and they'll stop.

And then they start hitting you with objects.
Books first. Or shoes. and then heavier books and rocks and chains.
Are we still ignoring it? Are we ignoring blood and bruises?

Fighting back sometimes works.
In my experience, it just means they bring more people to beat you next time. Because no little punk can get away with doing that.
And where you had one assailant, whom you might be able to beat in a fight, now you have three. Or five.

I'm pleased to see adults starting to take things seriously instead of giving the "ignore it" advice.
Or worse, putting bully and victim in close and constant proximity.
I wish it had happened sooner.