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valarltdIt's that time of year again!
Time for all good nonbelievers to sharpen up their tongues and horns and go after the poor persecuted majority who celebrate Christmas.
Why if you don't take up this call, who knows what might happen!
Retailers might start putting up decorated evergreens before the Halloween candy hits clearance! Or worse, in JULY!
Garland, lights, shapes on lightpoles, decorated trees all might start showing up in public places!
Retailers might stay in the red all year, a clear triumph of capitalism!
Ordinary citizens might shamelessly display tens of thousands of lights on their houses and trees, or worse, put out giant inflatable snowmen and Santas, light up reindeer, nativity scenes or the local football mascots pulling Santa's sleigh.
Churches might have to emphasize love and peace and good-will toward people.
The mailbox might get crowded with envelopes bearing greetings and well wishes from friends and relatives.
Small children might wander the neighborhood, banging on doors and *horrors* SINGING at helpless householders!
Endless music might pour from radio and loudspeakers, caroling about angels and newborn kings, about sleighbells and snow, about home and family.
Fruitcakes and almond crescents and butter cookies, popcorn tins and peppermint nougats, peppermint bark, cherry cordial kisses and Godiva chocolate might fill the candy aisle of your local store.
People might *gasp* say MERRY CHRISTMAS! After all, it's such an offensive holiday that only 90% of the country celebrates it!
Oh...wait.
But what do I know? I'm an Unreal American anyway. I don't live in a small town. I'm a woman. I'm not straight or Christian. I have a college education. The only thing I have in common with "Real Americans" is my skin color, same as 75% of the population. So of course, I can't POSSIBLY understand.
I say Happy Holidays. If someone wishes me a Merry Christmas, they get one back. If I don't know what they celebrate, they get a Happy Holidays, since there are six major religious holidays that all fall in December. Acknowledging these IS the War on Christmas writ large.
There are holly and mistletoe and a tree, but there are no Jesus ornaments on it. There is no Nativity scene or electric train under it either.
We hang stockings, but Santa doesn't fill them. Father Winter does.
All our Santa pictures are the Father Christmas style, not the Coca-Cola/Thomas Nast style.
I sing VERY rude words about "Faunus the Roman Goat God" instead of Rudolph. But not in front of the children.
So, of course, I just don't get it. How could I, being in an inter-faith household?
My husband is nominally Christian. He hates Christmas. He hates carols. When they made him, they cast him the Scrooge mold and called it good. (He doesn't believe in ghosts, so he has no fear there)
My boys are nonbelievers.
My girls, like me, are pagan.
So, break out your scourges of holly leaves, sharpen your antlers, light a nine or seven-pronged torch and let's wage that War proudly!
Never mind that we are so outnumbered as to be insignificant, especially when you consider interfaith families and non-Christians who celebrate the holiday as a purely secular one.
Christians are 75% of the population.
Non-Believers are 15%.
Non-Christians are about 4%:
Jews at 1.2% are still the largest.
Eastern Religions (including Buddhism) are at .9%.
Muslims are .5%
"New Religious movements and others" are 1.2%.
(About 5% didn't answer the Aris poll)
Clearly, we are winning!
Time for all good nonbelievers to sharpen up their tongues and horns and go after the poor persecuted majority who celebrate Christmas.
Why if you don't take up this call, who knows what might happen!
Retailers might start putting up decorated evergreens before the Halloween candy hits clearance! Or worse, in JULY!
Garland, lights, shapes on lightpoles, decorated trees all might start showing up in public places!
Retailers might stay in the red all year, a clear triumph of capitalism!
Ordinary citizens might shamelessly display tens of thousands of lights on their houses and trees, or worse, put out giant inflatable snowmen and Santas, light up reindeer, nativity scenes or the local football mascots pulling Santa's sleigh.
Churches might have to emphasize love and peace and good-will toward people.
The mailbox might get crowded with envelopes bearing greetings and well wishes from friends and relatives.
Small children might wander the neighborhood, banging on doors and *horrors* SINGING at helpless householders!
Endless music might pour from radio and loudspeakers, caroling about angels and newborn kings, about sleighbells and snow, about home and family.
Fruitcakes and almond crescents and butter cookies, popcorn tins and peppermint nougats, peppermint bark, cherry cordial kisses and Godiva chocolate might fill the candy aisle of your local store.
People might *gasp* say MERRY CHRISTMAS! After all, it's such an offensive holiday that only 90% of the country celebrates it!
Oh...wait.
But what do I know? I'm an Unreal American anyway. I don't live in a small town. I'm a woman. I'm not straight or Christian. I have a college education. The only thing I have in common with "Real Americans" is my skin color, same as 75% of the population. So of course, I can't POSSIBLY understand.
I say Happy Holidays. If someone wishes me a Merry Christmas, they get one back. If I don't know what they celebrate, they get a Happy Holidays, since there are six major religious holidays that all fall in December. Acknowledging these IS the War on Christmas writ large.
There are holly and mistletoe and a tree, but there are no Jesus ornaments on it. There is no Nativity scene or electric train under it either.
We hang stockings, but Santa doesn't fill them. Father Winter does.
All our Santa pictures are the Father Christmas style, not the Coca-Cola/Thomas Nast style.
I sing VERY rude words about "Faunus the Roman Goat God" instead of Rudolph. But not in front of the children.
So, of course, I just don't get it. How could I, being in an inter-faith household?
My husband is nominally Christian. He hates Christmas. He hates carols. When they made him, they cast him the Scrooge mold and called it good. (He doesn't believe in ghosts, so he has no fear there)
My boys are nonbelievers.
My girls, like me, are pagan.
So, break out your scourges of holly leaves, sharpen your antlers, light a nine or seven-pronged torch and let's wage that War proudly!
Never mind that we are so outnumbered as to be insignificant, especially when you consider interfaith families and non-Christians who celebrate the holiday as a purely secular one.
Christians are 75% of the population.
Non-Believers are 15%.
Non-Christians are about 4%:
Jews at 1.2% are still the largest.
Eastern Religions (including Buddhism) are at .9%.
Muslims are .5%
"New Religious movements and others" are 1.2%.
(About 5% didn't answer the Aris poll)
Clearly, we are winning!
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no subject
Date: 2009-12-13 06:25 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-13 06:33 pm (UTC)