Random ranting
Dec. 9th, 2003 11:51 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
valarltdSo, I managed to express myself badly again and outrage a bunch of people. What was meant as a critique of patterns in male desire was taken as a criticism of female bodies.
A large number of men in a group expressed a preference for small breasts. Coupled with their preference for shaved ladies, this distressed me. To me: small breasts + no
hair=too young . So is this a tendency toward quasi-pedophilia, of the “barely legal, tiny teens” variety? Or is it a rejection of women for girls? A rejection of fertile adults for plastic-form nonthreatening dolls? (Even Barbie is stacked)
Fertility (signaled by body types that include large breasts, broad hips, and hair) is not a valued attribute in our society. It hasn’t been since large families became a liability in the Depression. (note the broad shoulders and mannish look of women’s clothes in the 40’s) There was a resurgence in the 50’s but Twiggy killed it in the 60’s and it’s been dead ever since.
I think fashion ties in directly with our sense of ourselves as female, of whether we consider our bodies our allies or just something our minds have to schlep around or our active enemies. I think it influences what men see as desirable, and what women see as desirable in themselves.
That’s why the “too thin, flat chested, no pubic hair” look so popular today distresses me. It says they either want barely pubescent girls or they really want boys.
It feels like a rejection of adulthood, an avoidance of paternity (in our adult-delayed society, delayed parenting is a given among the better-off) that jibes with our birth-control culture.
In fact maturity of all sorts seems to be in short supply. When did it become acceptable to be a “guy” and never become a “man?” I was thinking about the whole “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” thing. I find it offensive.
I don’t find the Fab 5 offensive. I find the ideas of maleness that the show perpetrates to be offensive. When did “male” become equal to “slob with no sense of taste or hygiene who believes food magically appears, can’t dance and has no culture?”
A man has discriminating taste. In clothing, in food, in alcohol, in art. He knows what he likes. He knows how to dress well. Not flashy, but quiet and understated. He knows that lime green shag carpet is unacceptable. He knows how to order from a menu, tip, and read a wine list. Playboy was a guide for men, showing them the sophistication and good life. And men who read it knew what they were doing. (even if they did expect airbrushing)
A guy, apparently, wears whatever he found in the Goodwill bin, with white socks, sleeps on a sleeping bag on the lime green shag and lives on McDonalds. His sole alcohol expertise lies in knowing that Pabst Blue Ribbon makes him barf quicker than Coors. He stacks the Penthouse and Hustler 3’ high and downloads stuff off the net because it gets him off. Playboy has too many articles.
I think this immaturity in males makes them demand a similarly immature look in their women.
Tying this in with fandom: Rhett Butler was a man. No one would dispute that. He dressed well, rode well, danced well, and loved a variety of women in different ways. No one would call him queer because he could lead a reel. No one called him metrosexual because he memorized the details of ladies’ fashion (to better report to the ladies of Atlanta). And anyone who did would find himself facing a crack shot of a man who had made a living at riverboat gambling and survived a knife-fight in the California gold fields.
What do we get today?
(Dang, there’s an article in this if I could just articulate it.)
A large number of men in a group expressed a preference for small breasts. Coupled with their preference for shaved ladies, this distressed me. To me: small breasts + no
hair=too young . So is this a tendency toward quasi-pedophilia, of the “barely legal, tiny teens” variety? Or is it a rejection of women for girls? A rejection of fertile adults for plastic-form nonthreatening dolls? (Even Barbie is stacked)
Fertility (signaled by body types that include large breasts, broad hips, and hair) is not a valued attribute in our society. It hasn’t been since large families became a liability in the Depression. (note the broad shoulders and mannish look of women’s clothes in the 40’s) There was a resurgence in the 50’s but Twiggy killed it in the 60’s and it’s been dead ever since.
I think fashion ties in directly with our sense of ourselves as female, of whether we consider our bodies our allies or just something our minds have to schlep around or our active enemies. I think it influences what men see as desirable, and what women see as desirable in themselves.
That’s why the “too thin, flat chested, no pubic hair” look so popular today distresses me. It says they either want barely pubescent girls or they really want boys.
It feels like a rejection of adulthood, an avoidance of paternity (in our adult-delayed society, delayed parenting is a given among the better-off) that jibes with our birth-control culture.
In fact maturity of all sorts seems to be in short supply. When did it become acceptable to be a “guy” and never become a “man?” I was thinking about the whole “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” thing. I find it offensive.
I don’t find the Fab 5 offensive. I find the ideas of maleness that the show perpetrates to be offensive. When did “male” become equal to “slob with no sense of taste or hygiene who believes food magically appears, can’t dance and has no culture?”
A man has discriminating taste. In clothing, in food, in alcohol, in art. He knows what he likes. He knows how to dress well. Not flashy, but quiet and understated. He knows that lime green shag carpet is unacceptable. He knows how to order from a menu, tip, and read a wine list. Playboy was a guide for men, showing them the sophistication and good life. And men who read it knew what they were doing. (even if they did expect airbrushing)
A guy, apparently, wears whatever he found in the Goodwill bin, with white socks, sleeps on a sleeping bag on the lime green shag and lives on McDonalds. His sole alcohol expertise lies in knowing that Pabst Blue Ribbon makes him barf quicker than Coors. He stacks the Penthouse and Hustler 3’ high and downloads stuff off the net because it gets him off. Playboy has too many articles.
I think this immaturity in males makes them demand a similarly immature look in their women.
Tying this in with fandom: Rhett Butler was a man. No one would dispute that. He dressed well, rode well, danced well, and loved a variety of women in different ways. No one would call him queer because he could lead a reel. No one called him metrosexual because he memorized the details of ladies’ fashion (to better report to the ladies of Atlanta). And anyone who did would find himself facing a crack shot of a man who had made a living at riverboat gambling and survived a knife-fight in the California gold fields.
What do we get today?
(Dang, there’s an article in this if I could just articulate it.)
