An interesting revelation

The story of Jesus and the fig tree has been bugging me for a while since dv_girl posted on the subject. I always felt sorry for the tree. And I remember Bertrand Russell talking about the story in "Why I am not a Christian."

For those who don't remember, the Mark version of the story:
Mark 11:12-14
12 And on the morrow, when they were come from Bethany, he was hungry: 13 And seeing a fig tree afar off having leaves, he came, if haply he might find any thing thereon: and when he came to it, he found nothing but leaves; for the time of figs was not yet. 14 And Jesus answered and said unto it, No man eat fruit of thee hereafter for ever. And his disciples heard it.

I did a little research on standard interpretation.
Some say the fig tree is just a symbol for Judaism. The Jewish leaders are not beaqring fruit by welcoming the Messiah, and so the whole religion is accursed. Or that it was an illustration of how trees that did not bear good fruit would be cut down (a common metaphor) Or that it should be cross-referenced with Luke 13:6, which would make it a parable starring Jesus instead of one he told.

But today, I realized where else I had heard the story.

Erma Bombeck. Seriously.

She talks about a plant party in suburbia, where the women bring their ailing plants to be helped. One woman brings up this pot with some limp, pale leaves drooping out of it. The Plant Healer says "You need to encourage your plant, talk to it." The lady says "I did. I called it something not very nice." She whispers in the Plant Healer's ear. The Plant Healer droops to the stage, limp and pale.

Have the Angel Translation/Combination: (Imagine Jerry Clower or Bill Cosby telling this)

So we left Bethany and everyone was hungry. You know how it is. You're fine until someone says something, and then you're just starving. And James and John were bickering again and Judas was back there counting to see if we had enough for breakfast and going clank, clank, clank. When Peter piped up and said "Hey, check the fig tree up there," everyone got too excited. Wrong season, you know? Anyway we followed the Big Guy down to the tree, which didn't have any figs and that was when somebody whined.

The Boss blew it, man. Just totally lost his temper and cussed that tree up one side and down t'other. And that little ol' fig tree? Well, it just withered slap up and DIED, jack!

Happy Birthday, Howard

Today is H.P. Lovecraft's 120th birthday.

In honor of this, I give you an interview with him:

~

A link to his complete works:
http://www.dagonbytes.com/thelibrary/lovecraft/index.html

I suggest "Pickman's Model" and "The Shadow Over Innsmouth." (The Picture in the House follows the latter well)

~

One of his poems that has haunted me since childhood:
XII. The Howler
(first pub. Driftwind, 7, no. 3 (November 1932), 100.)

They told me not to take the Briggs' Hill path
That used to be the highroad through to Zoar,
For Goody Watkins, hanged in seventeen-four,
Had left a certain monstrous aftermath.
Yet when I disobeyed, and had in view
The vine-hung cottage by the great rock slope,
I could not think of elms or hempen rope,
But wondered why the house still seemed so new.
...
Stopping a while to watch the fading day,
I heard faint howls, as from a room upstairs,
When through the ivied panes one sunset ray
Struck in, and caught the howler unawares.
I glimpsed - and ran in frenzy from the place,
And from a four-pawed thing with human face.

~
And if you leave a comment, I will send you a copy of my Lovecraft Pastiche, Miskatonic Mistletoe, in which three werewolves and a half-elf save the world.

Still peddling

You have walked 300 miles.
You are at South of the Road.
It is 14 miles to the next landmark.
You have 458 miles to reach Rivendell.

Not once did they feel the sense of present evil that had assailed them before the attack in the dell.

http://www.barrowdowns.com/walktorivendell.php